forgot to turn in my paper whoopsies...

John Willis
Professor Sexson
Intro. to Literature 110
22 April 2010
Life is Simply a Tulip
People these days all too often fall into the trap of suburban boredom. They know not what to do with their spare time nor how to characterize their beliefs and views. I come from an Irish heritage and as you may know, we Irish are known for being stubborn and very logical minded. The Boondock Saints film could best describe my lifestyle and mentality. The last few years I have spent quite a bit of time in a state of meditation, you could say. Constantly arguing with my mind and myself trying to decide who I truly am. Life for a man in his early twenties is surely fast, changing, and hard to keep up with. Living in the real world, being treated as an individual adult with responsibilities, truly leaves curiosity on the brain. Dissecting who I really am psychologically has been one of my greatest unanswered questions in my short, still new lifetime. Literature class with my kooky witty professor in college surely eased my mind in many a way. I was a dull, logic based, creative thinker; now I am all but square with my eyes wide open to stories teaching me about the path I will follow in life.
The thought of literature solving my paradox of who I really am never crossed my mind even for a blink. I honestly could count the number of books I have truly read, and comprehended, in my lifetime on my fingers. Then Professor quoted in class “How do we know what we think until we see what we say?”, and it hit me as I copied those very words into my notebook. Why had it taken all these years of English class for a teacher to say these words to me? Writing down your thoughts and ideas clearly connects your visual conscious mind with you subconscious. The Professor then had my attention for the remainder of the semester. Even as I am writing this story on who I will become, I am learning so much about myself while subconsciously communicating this jumbled pile of words to the audience.
Reading short stories this semester, without my anxiety of getting schoolwork done, was another rude awakening. Actually dedicating my full attention to any piece of literature is not something I had accomplished before this semester of mental growth at school. Reading the words of James Joyce’s “Araby” truly captivated my mind with how much “depth” his words portray. I could see the more depth a story was given, through words, the more your imagination worked to create the inner work of art and memory for that reading. The poem “Disillusionment of Ten O’Clock” could be summed up as the doorway into our thoughts. As I read the poem for the first time, and every time since then, I find myself in an utter state of calm, quiet, peace of mind. Something I am definitely not associated with. My mind always finds a way to stay busy. It is always working as long as I am conscious and clear of any poisons that intoxicate the body. The poem finishes off with what I call “the dreaded awakening from a good dream”; “Drunk and asleep in his boots, Catches tigers In red weather (Stevens, 877).” The poem seems to make no conscious sense as I read it but because the words seem to flow calmly as if it were a brook, suddenly I visualize a sailor drunk and sleeping outside, then I snap out of the trans once I read the words “Catching tigers In red weather(Stevens, 877).” When I first awaken from any dream I always immediately recall the last image in my head because that image woke me up. “Catching tigers In red weather” is just such an image.
Reading tragic stories and plays such as “The Lady with the Pet Dog” and “Antigone”, I began to embrace my emotional feelings as being merely human. Yes tragedy is funny, the definition of tragedy refers to the depiction of human suffering for the pleasure of an audience. But tragedy also tells a true story about the power of feelings and social dilemma’s we, as humans, encounter everyday. Love is such a powerful emotion that can overcome and suppress all other problems in one’s current life . Reading “Antigone” teaches you about fierce love and harsh intensified human emotion. In my mind I saw Antigone yelling at her sister in the first scene with Creon. Finishing the play we realize our youthful years are our passionate years. Everyday is an up or down day and until we realize we are all doomed to fail, we do not comprehend the world we live in. Before society accepts us an individual, we must first prove to society that we accept ourselves. Tragic literature captivates the naïve mind and defines whether things are worth fighting for or letting go of.
“To be or not to be- (Shakespeare, 1259)”, when read in context, is much deeper than just Shakespearean words. Although the statement could be argued to be just a simple sentence, I believe all of Shakespeare’s work seems to reflect perfection in detail. When “the prof” announced the powerful sentence fragment in class my opinions on Shakespeare became even clearer. “To exist, or not to exist (Shakespeare, 1259).” Yes, Shakespeare explained these words in the rest of the soliloquy but I could not follow in depth. Stories are all retellings, the only non-retold stories are the ones inspired by your inner fire. Through the emotions of rage and pain new stories are made and discovered. If you use your mind to make rational decisions and write a story, then you have only retold. However, if you rely on purely writing your thoughts while in a sense of irrational behavior, your mind will spit ideas out that you may have never thought about or seen before. Upon understanding this process of writing and storytelling, I have applied it to my everyday scenarios, I have found the most humanistic way of life to live.
Taking apart a young mans view of the world, an elder will say “You have no concept for what lies ahead” and children will preach “Your life has too much stuff going on”. I say my life is that of the ocean, wave after wave like day after day. The tide swells in and out similar to the moods brought about by young hormones. The only logic I have found to work well in life is Carpe Diem. Seizing this day is the only true importance to being a human. Making every moment count because it could be a moment that changes you forever. Walking into class, the professor babbling on some random topic, I find myself mentally pushing to engage. Not only because this class could be another part of the college experience to bend my mind, but bend it in a way to straighten my thoughts and ideas.




Works Cited

Chekhov, Anton. “The Lady with the Pet Dog.” Retellings: A Thematic Literature
Analogy. Ed. M. B. Clarke and A. G. Clarke. New York: McGraw-Hill, 20004.
437-448.
Joyce, James. “Araby.” Retellings: A Thematic Literature Anaology. Ed. M. B. Clarke
and A. G. Clarke. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2004. 547-550.
Oates, Joyce Carol. “The Lady with the Pet Dog.” Retellings: A Thematic Literature
Analogy. Ed. M. B. Clarke and A. G. Clarke. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2004.
449-460.
Shakespeare, William. “Hamlet, Prince of Denmark.” Retellings: A Thematic
Literature Analogy. Ed. M. B. Clarke and A. G. Clarke. New York:
McGraw-Hill, 2004. 1215-1317.
Sophocles. “Antigone.” Retellings: A Thematic Literature Anthology. Ed. M. B. Clarke
and A. G. Clarke. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2004. 1006-1043.
Stevens, Wallace. “Disillusionment of Ten O’Clock.” Retellings: A Thematic Literature
Analogy. Ed. M. B. Clarke and A. G. Clarke. New York: McGraw-Hill, 2004.
876-877.